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« Frontline Launches 25th Anniversary Season (PBS) | Main | Southern California is Burning » Fires Rage out of Control »

Feeling Gratitude Amid Trying Circumstances

Finding Nemo » Dory & MarlonFeeling a profound sense of gratitude, which is surprising, considering the challenges befallen me recently .. such as the tweaked neck and what-not.

I don't understand it myself. Perhaps I'm in denial. Or maybe I sense (intuitively) some good news about to arrive from the cosmos. (Wishful thinking?)

The neck is still sore/stiff, but it's the least of my worries right now. And besides, there's nothing I can do to make it heal any faster, other than rest. (Tomorrow will be two weeks since I went sailing over then handlebars and landed on my head.)

My overriding concern is the threat of the Bug being taken away. (Far away.) As previously mentioned, I'm doing everything I can to prevent that from happening. (For example, I spent yesterday afternoon at the courthouse.) But the decision is out of my hands. And I can no longer afford an attorney.

Speaking of the Bug, he slept over earlier this week. I had the *coolest* dream that night .. about us going to the beach - a magical beach, on a picture-perfect day, late in the afternoon.

The water was crystal clear and warm, the white sand powdery soft. The nicest people camped nearby - families, with fancy cameras, who shot video of the Bug & I playing together...

.. as tall masted ships sailed in agitated seas just offshore. We swam however, in tranquil waters, with dolphins and brightly-colored fish within a protective reef. Our beach-neighbors even offered me an extra coffee they'd brought along from Starbucks. Talk about an idyllic setting.

The dream left me in such an enchanted state that I felt wrapped in a glow of paternal contentment for days afterward.

••• today's entry continues below ••• 

One thing I'm definitely feeling grateful about (following the recent mountain biking mishap) is that I didn't break my neck, and that I'm not a quadriplegic .. especially after seeing (the movies ») The Sea Inside and Million Dollar Baby (both Oscar winning films).

I mean, I have much to be grateful for .. such as living in a veritable garden of eden. I'm also pleased transitions with the Bug are going better. If you recall, he was crying when transitioning back to his mom, which bothered me.

I explained to him (since he's only 2 years old) that I loved him and wanted to spent *all* my time with him .. but that daddy has to share him with mom .. just like he has to share his toys with other kids at the park (playground). He got it. Now, when I tell him, "Mom's on her way over to get you," he says with a nod, "We gotta share." "That's right," I say.

I also suggested we do some exchanges at public places, such as bookstores and toy stores, which distract him from what's going on. He focuses on the the surroundings, and not the exchange. That idea worked remarkably well. So despite some thorny challenges, I'm still feeling grateful (without even trying).

At the local coffee shop yesterday, I noticed a guy reading a book titled » The Philosophy of Science, which caught my eye (since I enjoy both Philosophy & Science.) The owner said the book was required for a class he was taking (as part of a Masters program).

Afterward he said, "I overheard you telling Anna* about your son. I see you with him here all the time. Very sorry to hear that. I spend a half hour in prayer every day, and I'd like to pray about your situation - if you don't mind."

* Anna is a 70-year old granny who I sometimes have breakfast with. She's always trying to fix me up with somebody. I tell her, "I only want you, Anna. If I can't have you, I'm not interested." =)

This morning I was introduced to a girl with muscular arms, which I find sexy. "Baby pythons," I call them. Admiring her arms however, was the extent of my interest. (I have enough problems.) She claimed 90% of her muscular development was due to genetics. The other 10% she attributed to yoga.


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